Holiday Workout Challenge

Hiatuses are overrated dont you think? Ive missed my blog! :)

So a friend of mine invited me to join a Holiday Workout Challenge on Facebook. Its an 8 week challenge from November 1st to December 26th. Each participant made individual goals they would like to meet, and we also committed to 30 minute workouts, 5 days a week. And if you follow all the rules there is even an drawing to win some fitness prizes. And its FREE to participate. Pretty cool eh?

I wasnt sure how I would do with 5 days of workouts. That is a large commitment especially with my school and work schedule. Not to mention that before the challenge my workouts were very inconsistent. But I was up for the challenge. Especially anything that keeps me motivated through the holidays!

Here are the goals I made:

• I am committing to 5 days of workouts, with 3 of those running.
• Drop one size, and stay off the scale!
• Scale down my pop intake! Im going to start off with one 20 ounce every other day, and hope to be at zero by the end of the challenge!

I have to admit I got off to a rocky start. Than again I was on vacation that first week of the challenge. So tried not to stress to much about it. When I got back it did take a couple of weeks, but once I said enough is enough, I gave it everything I could. I finally had some motivation to get to those 5:45am cycling classes! And now I cant see starting off my Monday and Wednesday mornings any other way! On other days I have been running or doing a circuit/strength training DVD at home. I'm happy to say that I am now in my fourth week of 5 day workouts! It really does feel like part of my day now. Its a habit! I never thought I would be saying that. I just feel healthier. I haven't dropped much weight, but that's okay. Because I feel thinner. I feel stronger. I feel like I'm making better choices. And that's what its all about!

Now that pop goal...yeah that hasn't been going so great. So I think for these last few weeks Ill really try to focus on that a little bit better ;)

Its All About Finding Something You Love

And I LOVE cycling class!!!! I would always hear people say, when you find an exercise you really love, than working out will be fun! I use to think that was to good to be true. :p

Ive been dealing with some difficult times at work, that have resulted in my stress levels being out of control. Ive heard some rumors that the 5:30 cycling class is more intense than the 6:45 class I currently attend. I was a little intimidated to try it, but after one of my oh so stressful days at work I decided I needed to get my ass kicked. And that I did! I have now moved this class up as a high priority on my weekly workout schedule :) So much I even got up at 8am on Saturday to go to this instructors class! Now that is really out of character for me. Who is this girl? And what did you do with Melissa? LOL

I really felt like I was going to keel over in this workout. This class is a whole different ballgame than what Im use to! At one point I thought to myself..I may need to walk out! But I took it one song at a time, and tried to keep up with the resistance she had us at. As challenging as that was! Now I may not as been as fast as everyone, but I did what I could. Definitely an A for effort, IMO! No worries though, Ill get there someday. We all need goals to strive for ;) I LOVED her song selections to. It really helps you get into the workout. The best part of the workout was the very end...right when I felt like I didnt have anything left in me. We were doing sprints to the song, Best of You by the Foo Fighters. This song was perfect for the work day I had. I closed my eyes, and just let the music sprint me away.





Dont you love moments like that? Its like that moment is just speaking to you and helping you push through one of the million things clouding up your head!

I really like the way she runs her class to. She pushes us with the moves rather than screaming in her headset. There would be a few times she would vocally push us but it always felt like it was right at the moment I needed it. I really prefer that. I hate being screamed at...it pierces my ears!

Im so excited, and looking forward to each class. I love being pushed to my limits, and have fun while doing it! I didnt think I would ever say that! Im loving the growth and changes Im making. LOVING IT!

Reaching For The Stars

Last night I was searching the interweb for info on Jillian Michaels book, Master Your Metabolism. Someone recently told me she suffered from hypothyroid. I am intrigued.

For the record, I heart Jillian Michaels. <3

I found quite a few reviews on the book, and they all had one thing in common. This book is a must read! Some even said its one of the best health books out there. This is Jillians way of getting out what worked best for her, and if I ever get to that point I think I would want to do the same thing! Im open to reading about anyone with thyroid disease. And it really feels like you have to listen to all the stories out there! Hypothyroidism is such a perplexed disease. Its safe to say that a treatment that works for one person, doesnt always work for the next. Nonetheless, what works for one person could be a step into the right direction to your own healthy being. It can never hurt to try new things to help with your own thyroid disease! Im really interested in hearing her thoughts on hormonal imbalance. This is the part that endocrinologists dont really touch on (at least all the ones Ive been to). And its such a huge part of hypothyroidism, and definitely makes my own journey very complex.

When reading this interview with Jillian Michaels, I had a wonderful aha! moment. I love when I have those! I found this interview in Health magazine's, November issue. This is the question/answer that stuck out to me:

Q: In terms of our fitness efforts, where do we go wrong?

A: We sell ourselves short when it comes to capability and potential. We read on the treadmill. We walk. People will be like, “I’ve been walking.” And I’m like, “Really? Really?” [Laughs.] “OK, you walked to the car, and then to the door at the mall, and then you took the stairs, too? Come on, man.”

If I can take a 66-year-old man and train him six hours a day, six days a week, you can do more than just take the stairs! People have no concept of what the human body is really designed to do. They have no concept of their strength! And they function in a zone that is well below what their potential really is.

This is so true. Ive been at the gym so many times, jump on a piece of equipment for 30 minutes and pat myself on the back like I just completed a marathon. And was that 30 minutes everything I could give it? Was it high intensity? Or was it just a leisure workout? More than likely it was somewhere around leisurely. I am selling myself short. I am not reaching my FULL potential. I'm only cheating myself! (As you can tell Jillian is in my head. ha!)

Go big or go home, right?

I have the odds against me with my thyroid disease in the first place, so yes sir I need to go BIG! Im putting in the time for the workout, so why not push myself to get the most out of my workout? Seems like common sense doesnt it? Than why do we so often NOT do it? Because we think we can't do it? Or maybe because we think simply working out is an accomplishment by itself. But who wants to be mediocre? Not me! Making strides in my workouts gives me confidence. I know this from experience. And I want that feeling back again!

With all that being said, today (dont you love first day of the months?), was my first 60 minute cardio session. I did a 3 mile run and than jumped on the elliptical for 15 minutes. During my run I got all the way up to 5.7mph! Lately Im lucky if I get up to 5 mph. I just kept pushing myself and it felt great! And guess what? I didnt die. I didnt fly off the treadmill. I adapted to it. Amazing what you can do when you just try!

So excited to see where I am at the end of this month!

Days With My Father

I was watching the news tonight and there was an interview with this photographer, Phillip Toledano. He has created an amazing project, Days With My Father. Phillip's mother suddenly passed away, and he began taking care of his 98 year old father who suffered from Dementia. He has created a photo journal of the last days with his father. I can only imagine how hard this was to do, and have so much admiration for Phillip to have completed this project. I can imagine what this did for him personally, and also how this touched so many other people.

As I watched this slide show I went through a whirlwind emotions. I cried, a lot. And they were hard cries...where my eyes were so filled with so many tears that the computer screen got blurry. Shortly after that I would find myself laughing. There are some hilarious stories in this project...some that remind me of my own father :) And than of course more crying, with large waves of sadness. Through those tears I would find a smile creeping out as well. It really was a emotional roller coaster. The connection between the father and son in these pictures is so hard to put into words. I could say strong, but it was so much more. You could just feel all the emotions the father and the son went through in each picture. Simply amazing.

It obviously made me think of my own relationship with my dad, and even my grandpa. What strong aspects there were, and also what the relationship lacked that I wish I could of made stronger. Lots of emotions were brought up and Im thankful that they were released. This project helped me have a nice cleanse of tears. I could feel emotions lingering lately, but I kept fighting them. Something I probably do more than Id like. It also made me reflect on my own life. Where Ive been, where Im at now, and where I want to be. Amazing how a project of images and words can touch you in ways you never imagined. Thank you Phillip Toledano for being so vulnerable and strong to make a project like this. You have touched a special part in my heart, and helped in my own healing process. For that I will be forever grateful!

Here is a quote from Phillip himself about the project:

“When I was taking pictures of my father, I felt like someone drinking deeply from the well for a last time, before setting out on a long journey alone. I wanted to remember as much as possible. To see as much as I could, to remember smells, conversations, the light on my father’s face when he smiled, when he was angry. It was very strange, spending time with someone I knew would die soon (we both knew, and where both waiting for it). I did the project never thinking it would speak to other people. It’s funny, now, in retrospect, that something I thought was so personal is so universal. A big part of the project now has been the reaction from others. It’s incredible getting emails from people who want to reconnect with their estranged fathers, after looking at the work. Or from families, who’ve looked at the photos together. I have to say, it’s been an honor to help people.”

I encourage all of you to take a few minutes and check this out. Make sure you grab a tissue though!

http://www.dayswithmyfather.com

Stepping Outside My Comfort Zone - Trance Dance

Just as I have started on this journey of me - I got an email from my friend, Fran. Fran inspires me. She always gets me to try new things, and just step outside my comfort zone. I love that about her!

When I got an email from her that had the title, Trance Dance, I thought to myself...oh boy, what could this be about! Now most people who know me know that I dislike Trance music, very much. I opened up the email and found something completely different than I thought. It is a type of moving mediation that is done blind folded. A friend of Fran's, Adele, has this friend that is a facilitator. She was having a free session at her house for 10 people. I was really intrigued so I RSVP'd, and looked into it a bit further on the Internet. I LOVED everything I read. It was something I was looking for to come out of my comfort zone, as well as connect with myself in a way I havent done in a long time.

Just to give a little bit more info about Trance Dance, I have copied this info from their website. Rather than me try to explain it and get half the point across. :p

TranceDance is a unique blend of body movement, healing sounds, dynamic percussive rhythms, transformational breathing techniques and the innovative use of a blindfold or bandanna - together stimulating a 'trance' state that promotes spiritual awakenings, mental clarity, physical stamina and emotional well-being. Driven by unique musical soundtracks recorded specifically for this method of healing, Trance Dance takes participants on an 'inner journey' not limited to our normal perceptions of space/time. Ritual trance journeys have been a vital part of shamanic and eastern dance cultures for thousands of years. Our contemporary approach to Trance Dance brings together the richness of these ancient rituals with some startlingly effective modern techniques.

TranceDance's primary focus is on healing and spiritual evolution. By dancing within the seclusion of darkness participants discover parallel realities where solutions to seemingly unsolvable problems are possible. Through Trance Dance we `disappear', becoming more like spirit, and simultaneously less attached to life's ordinary difficulties, making it possible at these moments to let these problems go.

When we arrived at the facilitator, Deb's, house the mood was already set. There was dimmed lights, candles lit, fire place going, music playing, and incense burning. Her living room was clear of furniture, with a wood floor. Getting even more intrigued! There were 6 of us that attended, which seemed to be a perfect number of people for the size room we had. We all gathered in a circle on the floor while Deb went over some key things about the Trance Dance. She had gone on a 10 day retreat in Guatemala where she was trained to be a facilitator. It sounded like an amazing experience! Some key things she had said, was that you may feel like you are fighting it. Dont. Just let the fear go, and go with it. She said that everyones journey would be different, and some people may get emotional. Its okay. And there is no right or wrong way to do this, everyones journey will be different and its always the right way.

The Trance Dance was a 90 minute session. When I heard this I thought, wow we are going to be standing/dancing for 90 minutes. I wonder if I can mediate for this long. Honestly I wondered if I would even dance. So I put my blind fold on, and kept an open mind. The music was BEAUTIFUL. All kinds of different music. Lots of tribal with flutes, percussion, and jazz even thrown in at times. There would be singing at times, usually not in english. I just tried to stop thinking about what was going on, and mediate. I think it was probably the 3rd or 4th song in all of a sudden I felt like someone as pushing on my hip. Like getting it to move. And I just went with it. Next thing I knew my body was just moving. Not in a way that I usually dance though. It was so weird but awesome at the same time!

Another thing I noticed was that whole thing Deb had said about fighting it. She said to ask yourself why your resisting. The feeling felt like it was being stopped in the middle of my chest. Like there was something stopping it from going through my whole body. It almost felt like a panic attack. I just took a few deep breaths, and let it go. Towards the end of the dance I was really fatigued. My legs were like jello, and my body was just heavy. I wanted to sit down but thought someone might trip over me.

The dance ends with 3 minutes of the om chant. We all sat down during that and took off our blindfolds when we were ready. We all than sat in a circle again and shared our experiences. Some of the girls had some really amazing stories. How they had such an emotional connection during the Trance Dance. And how it brought them clarity to things going on in their life. And one girl even talked about how she got so angry at one point, but just worked through it. How amazing does this all sound?

It was a really interesting experience for me, but I didnt really experience a spiritual aspect...or emotional. But I think I probably did, but I just didnt know how to connect the physical feeling, with the mental/emotional feeling. Like that how thing where I needed to take deep breaths....there probably was some emotional connection but I couldnt connect them. Maybe because I dont mediate often? Maybe because I was resisting? Maybe because Im not ready? Who knows. I do know it was a pretty amazing journey, and something I definitely would want to do again. We had talked about as a group of doing this once a month, or every other month. I think I want to be part of that so I can learn more things about me. Im sure every journey is different. During some of the dancing that I did...I thought to myself I probably look like an idiot but this just feels right, and feels GOOD! I loved that feeling. Its not something I feel very often.

I cant wait to share my experience with my therapist. She highly recommends music therapy, especially drum circles..which is another experience I want to have! So maybe she can give me a little more insight on my experience.

I LOVE trying new things like this. While stepping outside of my comfort zone is scary, it is also exhilarating. I need to do it more often! Growth is such an amazing thing...I seem to forget that since its been so long since Ive felt it!

The Year Of Me

When I was in therapy last week I was letting every emotion out. I felt like I was reaching a pretty low point. And just overwhelmed with life. I sort of talked a bit about this a few posts ago...

Well one thing that really got me down is I had to drop my classes this semester so we would have the extra money for all of Vinyls vet appointments. Ive finally registered for this interior design class, and was really looking forward to it. It was the one thing I was holding on to that I thought would bring some joy into my life. Don't get me wrong, there are many things great about my life....Grant, the dogs, etc. But I really needed something to help me personally. To light that fire in me again. So I was really looking forward to this. My therapist, being the smart woman she is, reassured me. She told me its okay you can take it next semester. For now you can just focus on you. On getting your health back on track, finding a new job, and just working on making you a happy, healthier person.

What a great concept, dont you think? How come it takes someone to say it to me to realize it than. LOL So since that session I have just gone with that idea. I asked her for some ideas for stress relief and she threw some great ones out there. First of all I have really made a commitment to myself to seeing this exercise and healthy eating thing through. Im sure it wont be all rainbows everyday, but Im going to enjoy the journey. Ive started looking at different classes or lectures that I could take, and found some great ones on mediation, goal setting, etc. I also decided to really seek out a grief support group. I found a 8 week series workshop, From Grief to New Hope, that starts in March. Im anxious about that one, but know it will be comforting to meet people who are going through what Im going through. Even if it is 2 years later. Im really putting myself first for once. Working on me. Because I deserve it.

Can this finally be the year of Melissa? As cliche as it sounds....Im in control of my own destiny. So it sure could be my year. Ive realized how unhappy I am, and how that reflects on different events in my life. I wish I was just more secure and happy with myself during my wedding. So I could of really embraced the whole process. I did enjoy it, but it could of been even better if I was in the right state of mind. I cant change the past, so all I can do is make improvements for the future!

I see some stepping outside my comfort zone in the future.....

Super Successful lia sophia Fundraiser!

One of the reasons I became a lia sophia advisor was to offer fundraisers, especially to Breast Cancer 3 Day walkers. Being a participant myself I know how difficult it can be to raise $2k+, so I love to help people when I can. Since Im not walking this year I was hoping that I could help another walker by hosting a lia sophia fundraiser for them. And I got that chance this past Thursday :)

Sheri is a friend I met through the Pink Ladies. She has two friends that are walking this year with their daughters. That is $9200 they have to raise! Sheri contacted me and asked if I was interested in doing a lia sophia fundraiser for her friends. Of course I was! Debbie, the host of the party was great. She really knows how to throw a party. We never got a final headcount, but it was close to 50+ people there. In the end I had about 30 orders. I have to admit it was a little overwhelming, but exciting at the same time. It felt good to be in the presence of 3dayers. Ive missed it!

Ive never done a fundraiser or party that big yet, so now I have the experience under my belt. I'd bring a assistant next time, so the orders can get written up faster. And so I have time to talk more to the guests and tell them about the great benefits of lia sophia. I didnt really get a chance to talk to anyone really!

Total in sales: $2280!!!! How awesome is that?! When I do fundraisers I donate my entire commission, which is 30%. Im rounding up so she made $700! Not to shabby for a few hour party. Also, another benefit I do with my fundraisers is anyone that books from the fundraiser show I will donate 10% of that future shows sales as well. She got 2 bookings so she will be getting even more money donated.

Not being able to walk this year I was so glad I could help another walker out :) There was also a Partylite Consultant at the party, so I think with my commission and hers that will put these girls over their minimum to raise. Awesome!

Cant wait to cheer them on in a few weeks on the Breast Cancer 3 Day!

Operation Beautiful

I fell upon one of the most awesome sites while browsing blogs linked to blogs upon blogs the other day. Of course I have to share it!

Operation Beautiful - Ending Fat Talk One Anonymous Post-It At A Time!

We all do it. Fat Talk. Negative Talk. Get down on ourselves. Operation Beautiful has a mission of ending this negative talk by giving random acts of kindness. One of my favorite things to do!

The amazing person that started this wonderful venture is Caitlin. Her original mission was to put an end to Fat Talk, and encourage a positive body image. She has a whole page she blogged on how fat talk is so toxic to us, which can be found here. While starting this journey to end fat talk Caitlin fell upon the Gives Me Hope website. (Which by the way is another amazing website!And in my daily blogs to read :) ) It inspired her to start her own project which is where Operation Beautiful became a reality.

We can all join in on Operation Beautiful, it is very simple. You only need paper and pen. Just write a positive message on a post it and stick it in any public place you want. On bathroom mirrors, work, gym, grocery store, literally anywhere! Make sure you add the www.operationbeautiful.com at the bottom of your post it so even more people can find the website! If you take a picture of your random act of kindness, you can email it to Caitlin (seebriderun@gmail.com) and she features them on her blog. I religiously read the blog everyday now. Its the perfect way to start my day. :)

Seriously when I fell upon this I got the warm fuzzies inside. This reminds me of the Breast Cancer 3 Day. The 3 Day in my eyes is 3 days on how the world should be. The kindness, the huge hearts of people, the positivity, the support....its all so amazing. Big kudos to Caitlin for starting a project that screams so much positivity, and has endless opportunities in how it affects many people! I can not wait to start leaving my own notes and be part of such an amazing project!

One of my Ah-ha! Moments - HYC

So you know how you hear a saying a thousand times, but that one time you hear it it finally makes you go, Ah-ha! Dont you love those moments? I think you hear sayings over and over, and sometimes it just sounds like a broken record. You just dont see any meaning to it. But its that one specific time and place that makes that one saying speak to you in a totally different light. I had an ah-ha moment last week. It happened in cycling class.

I was a little nervous since I had not been to cycling class in a few weeks...actually over a month. As we were warming up the instructor said, Surprise! Its interval day. I thought to myself what did I get myself into?! And than he said, to finish off this great workout we will do a 13 minute hill climb standing up. I thought to myself, I hope I just make it the whole 60 minutes! Little did I know would I not only make it 60 minutes, but this workout was just what I needed

I love cycling class. It is the one workout where I feel like I push no matter what. No matter what is on my mind, or what happened earlier that day, or what mind frame Im in...I still push. Its like the one workout class where I literally let all my worries go and get lost in the class. Running is so opposite than that. I can say sometimes when Im done running I do get that great feeling that I consistently get during cycling class, but its not every time. Running is a much more love/hate relationship. Now cycling class is love only. (Sorry running! I still love you!) Everything about the class I love to pieces. The one awesome thing that always sticks out in my mind is that I feel like Im sweating out all those toxins in my body. And boy do I have toxins! When Im done I feel so refreshed and rejuvenated. This time was no different. The feeling came back so quickly, and I thought to myself you need to put cycling higher on your priority list! Oh how Ive missed you!

The intervals went well. Much better than I expected. Why are intervals in cycling so much nicer to me than intervals running? I think its having that bike underneath me or something...I feel more in control or something. Anyhoo....so as we were rounding the last half of the workout we landed into the last 13 minutes. Its all or nothing I thought to myself. Up the resistance went, and up on the bike I went. Our instructor tries to stay quiet so we can all have our zen place. Its a little hard for him but he does a good job. lol And he picks the most perfect music! Which also makes finding your zen a little bit easier. So after a minute or so I found that zen. As hard as your working, it feels just as relaxing as yoga. As strange as that sounds. The instructor told us to push our resistance up a bit, and when I did that I started to feel the intensity at a whole new level. I started to lose focus for a minute and than he said in a very loud, firm voice. YOU ARE IN CONTROL! THE HILL DOES NOT CONTROL YOU! YOU CONTROL THE HILL! That kept replaying through my head as I pushed out those last 5 minutes. When I was done....I pretty much had the cycling high. Does that happen or did I make that up? Anyways I felt fanfuckingtastic!

So as I carried out the rest of my week, whether it was a work stress situation, a workout I was trying to avoid, or even when making some of my food choices.....that saying replayed in my head again. You are in control! I found an ah-ha! moment. Dont you love those? I havent had one of those in a long time, so I got really geeked over it :) You are in control....such a simple phrase, yet it never really struck a cord with me before. Seriously, I control all my actions. I determine my fate. Im in control!

So glad I went to that cycling class. Another reason I need to go to class more often!

Keep Breathing

So to help with the difficult times Im compiling a playlist of feel good songs. Okay not all feel good. But songs that help me get through times like this. A dear friend of mine, Katie, has recommended this man, many times. She has gone through similar things like I have, and every song she refers me to...helps. Tremendously. Which means I need to download Kelly Clarkston like Katie recommended! One artist that helps me a lot is Ingrid Michaelson. Today I think Ive belted out singing this numerous times.

• Keep Breathing by Ingrid Michaelson

More Ingrid Michaelson music on iLike

The storm is coming but I don't mind
People are dying, I close my blinds

All that I know is I'm breathing now

I want to change the world
Instead I sleep
I want to believe in more than you and me

But all that I know is I'm breathing
All I can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing now

All that I know is I'm breathing
All I can do is keep breathing.
All we can do is keep breathing

All we can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing now

Thank you once again Miss Ingrid. XO

Give up? Not today!

So Ive felt pretty inspired since my post last night. Ive been keeping those thoughts in mind all day today. And its a good thing I did because today was an eventful day for me. In a not so great way. A few situations came up that would usually derail me right back to those things that keep holding me back. But today was different than other days. I took control, and said no.

First, I received a call from my mom today at work. My mom and I are estranged right now. She thought it would be a great idea to call me at work and let me know that my aunt passed away. And throw in digs about how great she is doing. (she is getting married next weekend) I was overwhelmed with emotions. For one, the passing of my aunt. She is my favorite aunt and has been sick for a long time. She has AIDS, so has been fragile for quite sometime. She got anemonia, which is how she passed. I also was overwhelmed with the fact that I was speaking to my mother for the first time in 6 months, and it wasnt my choice. So I decided to go out to lunch, and I was thinking fast food. I needed fast food, fast. Instead my coworker tagged along and she suggested Zoup. I said, that is a great idea. So we went to Zoup and I had soup and a half salad.

Another thing that happened today is I came home and decided that I would move on to level 3 on my Jillian Michaels 30 day shred workout. I got through the first circuit and thought I was going to die. I seriously couldnt handle it. I said, forget this and went to go shut it off. Than I remembered not to give up. So went back into position and just modified the moves where need be. Damn that was a hard workout. Its seriously 5 times harder than level 2! But I made it through without dying. And felt pretty good afterwards.

And lastly, I continued working on a paper for my art class. Ive been working on this paper for the last few days, and I am not making very good progress. As I sat there thinking there is no way this rough draft is going to be done tomorrow in time, so they negative talk started. Who do I think I am going back to school? I cant even write this paper. This was a huge mistake. Im so dumb. Forget it Im not even going to turn this in. Overreact much? I often do. I recollected my thoughts remembering my post again from last night. I refocused, completed a better outline for my paper, and decided Ill take the 5 point penalty and not turn in the rough draft.

In the midst of all this drama inside my head, Grant was letting me know he was going to Burger King for dinner. He asked what I wanted. I sat there for a minute...than said nothing. One of my goals this week is to not eat fast food. Ill eat the leftover subway in the fridge.

Go Mel!

Small changes. Being in control. Taking a minute to re-assess. Keep on moving forward no matter what! In with positive, out with the negative. I feel happy about my choices today :) Take that old Melissa :p

Healthy Reflections - HYC Week 10

So I always get these Healthy Reflection emails from Sparkpeople.com. They really get me thinking, and I received one in my inbox that I thought was perfect to blog about this week.

Who is standing in your way?

Something we were withholding made us weak, until we found it was ourselves. - Robert Frost

Imagine someone regularly tying small weights around your ankles as you try to climb a mountain. Doesn't sound fair, does it? But that's exactly what you can do to yourself, a little bit at a time, if you don't watch out. When you think of who and what is standing in the way of your dreams, it's easy to forget your own responsibility. Even the best of us can be guilty of unknowingly hurting our own progress. Procrastination, lateness, being disorganized, pessimism, not being honest with yourself, severe self-criticism, downplaying achievements, focusing only on weaknesses while ignoring strengths, keeping goals a secret, demanding perfection, giving up after a small setback--these are all ways you can make it tough to be (and do) your best. Smart systems, the right attitude, and a promise to keep going no matter what will make a world of difference.

Wow, seriously sparkpeople should let me know when they are hanging out inside my head! Its like they were calling me out. Every single thing they named seems to be me to a tee lately. And actually just before I decided to blog tonight the one thing on the top of the list is procrastination! Ive known about this paper Ive had to write since classes started in January, and the rough draft was postponed 2 weeks, yet I still havent started it. Actually Ive tried but just sit and stare at a blank screen. So I blogged instead. Procrastination at its best.

Lately Im so unorganized that it causes so much chaos for me. But I created it, no one else. I complain about people holding me up from being late, but than Im late myself. But I hardly will ever admit that to myself. The energy it takes to find the negativity in everything has definitely been wearing me down. And giving up seems to be my mantra lately. Since when did I give in so easily? Im a fighter, and love to feel like one! So who has taking over my body? I have news for them....I want the Melissa I know back.

Im in charge. Im ready to act like Im in charge. No more of this choosing who to blame. Im the only one to blame. I shall take responsibility. And for goodness sakes, no more negativity. No more focusing on my weakness. No more being so unsure of myself. Because where is it getting me? Absolutely nowhere! I have recommitted myself this week to my healthy lifestyle. To eating better, treating my body better, and being nicer to myself. If I hit a roadblock, so what! It makes the journey so much more worth it in the end. I owe it to myself to keep moving forward.

Smart systems, the right attitude, and a promise to keep going no matter what will make a world of difference. Sounds like great things to work on this week. First Ill start by getting to bed at a decent hour. So that will be my cue to say goodnight ;)

Law of the Garbarge Truck

So I received this email today, and thought it was so great that I had to share. Enjoy :)

One day I hopped in a taxi and we took off for the airport. We were driving in the right lane when suddenly a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, skidded, and missed the other car by just inches! The driver of the other car whipped his head around and started yelling at us. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean, he was really friendly. So I asked, 'Why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!' This is when my taxi driver taught me what I now call, 'The Law of the Garbage Truck.'

He explained that many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it and sometimes they'll dump it on you. Don't take it personally. Just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. Don't take their garbage and spread it to other people at work, at home, or on the streets. The bottom line is that successful people do not let garbage trucks take over their day. Life's too short to wake up in the morning with regrets, so...

Love the people who treat you right. Forgive the ones who don't. Life is ten percent what you make it and ninety percent how you take it! Have a wonderful, garbage-free day!--Author Unknown

Young At Heart Chorus

So as I laid on the couch yesterday battling this cold Im fighting, I decided to rent a movie. As I browsed through the "on demand" selection, I came across Young at Heart. As I read the synopsis, I remembered my friend, Paula, telling me about this film. It is a documentary about senior citizens that are in a choir and sing rock songs. I remember from her review that it is sad, but thats okay, I was up for some tears. And tears I got!

I definitely give this film four stars! It was such a moving documentary for me. The average age of the people in the chorus is 80. And the film follows the lives of these senior citizens while they prepare to perform in their home town, Massachusetts. They are attempting to learn 4 new songs to perform. James Brown - I Feel Good, Coldplay - Fix You, Schizophrenic - Sonic Youth, and Yes we Can Can - Allen Toussaint. Watching these senior citizens learn the words to these songs is pretty amazing, and a little painful at times. They have a hard time finding the rhythm and remembering the words. But when you see them perform it at the end, it really brings a whole new meaning to the songs...and interpt the songs in a different way.

As you watch the film, you really get to know the people in the chorus. There is Joe, who at 86 can remember a song in one afternoon (the only one in the group that can do that!), and he also has had enough chemo to kill a person, but he was still up on stage during while going through chemo treatments. Fred, who has congestive heart failure must sing sitting down with oxygen at his side, and has come back to do another performance with the chorus. Bob, who is a man of many many lives...he has faced death many times but always manages to make it back to the chorus.

Bob Cilman started the chorus in 1982, and while in the film he definitely has a few moments where he might lose his temper a bit, this man has a huge heart. What he has done for these people is amazing. You can just see the sparkle in their eyes when they speak about what the chorus means to them. As they deal with the physical pains that old age brings, they still get to practice every week, and get up there and sing and dance their hearts away!

In the second half of the film, two of the members in the chorus pass away. Bob, the man with many many lives, was in the hospital practicing his lines to Fix Me, by Coldplay, and had a heart attack and didn't survive. You could tell by a few series of events that might be the outcome, but this man was a fighter! He was going to sing Fix Me as a duet with Fred. And it was such a great song because of the meaning for both of them with their health problems. Fred sang the song as a solo in dedication to Bob at the concert. EMOTIONAL! He did an amazing job. It really was so touching. And than Joe, who had battled so much cancer, had a relapse and also passed away. It was something I cant explain or put into the right words....to watch this group deal with the grief of losing a friend, but still going forward and singing in their memory and honor. Incredible. Having the chorus together at that time was such a great support system, and really helped them in their grieving process. They performed at a jail just an hour after hearing of Bobs passing, and they dedicated Forever Young to him, and announced that to the audience. They had all those guys in jail in tears, and those guys all said this was one of the best performances they ever saw!

As I sobbed through this film, I also laughed through it to. It warmed my heart to watch it! I hope I can have such a great spirit as these people when I reach their age. They are a true inspiration! Music really does make such a difference in peoples lives, no matter what age! I would of loved to see this chorus perform!