Give up? Not today!

So Ive felt pretty inspired since my post last night. Ive been keeping those thoughts in mind all day today. And its a good thing I did because today was an eventful day for me. In a not so great way. A few situations came up that would usually derail me right back to those things that keep holding me back. But today was different than other days. I took control, and said no.

First, I received a call from my mom today at work. My mom and I are estranged right now. She thought it would be a great idea to call me at work and let me know that my aunt passed away. And throw in digs about how great she is doing. (she is getting married next weekend) I was overwhelmed with emotions. For one, the passing of my aunt. She is my favorite aunt and has been sick for a long time. She has AIDS, so has been fragile for quite sometime. She got anemonia, which is how she passed. I also was overwhelmed with the fact that I was speaking to my mother for the first time in 6 months, and it wasnt my choice. So I decided to go out to lunch, and I was thinking fast food. I needed fast food, fast. Instead my coworker tagged along and she suggested Zoup. I said, that is a great idea. So we went to Zoup and I had soup and a half salad.

Another thing that happened today is I came home and decided that I would move on to level 3 on my Jillian Michaels 30 day shred workout. I got through the first circuit and thought I was going to die. I seriously couldnt handle it. I said, forget this and went to go shut it off. Than I remembered not to give up. So went back into position and just modified the moves where need be. Damn that was a hard workout. Its seriously 5 times harder than level 2! But I made it through without dying. And felt pretty good afterwards.

And lastly, I continued working on a paper for my art class. Ive been working on this paper for the last few days, and I am not making very good progress. As I sat there thinking there is no way this rough draft is going to be done tomorrow in time, so they negative talk started. Who do I think I am going back to school? I cant even write this paper. This was a huge mistake. Im so dumb. Forget it Im not even going to turn this in. Overreact much? I often do. I recollected my thoughts remembering my post again from last night. I refocused, completed a better outline for my paper, and decided Ill take the 5 point penalty and not turn in the rough draft.

In the midst of all this drama inside my head, Grant was letting me know he was going to Burger King for dinner. He asked what I wanted. I sat there for a minute...than said nothing. One of my goals this week is to not eat fast food. Ill eat the leftover subway in the fridge.

Go Mel!

Small changes. Being in control. Taking a minute to re-assess. Keep on moving forward no matter what! In with positive, out with the negative. I feel happy about my choices today :) Take that old Melissa :p