Mind Over Matter

Running that is. I would say that after you get a base of a 3 mile run going...it truly is a game of mind over matter.

Today I had my last "practice run". Ive been working on building up a base so I could jump into my half marathon training. The first week of the training plan has me running 2 as my shortest run, and 4 as my longest. Ive worked myself up to 3 miles, and running 3 times a week. So I think Im ready to start the training program. EEK!

So today I decided you better take it outside girl. You cant train every run on a treadmill so get use to the freezing temps now! The sun was shining, and when I was outside earlier in the day it felt decent out. So I layered up and headed to my running spot, a bike path about 10 minutes from my house. Its the safest spot for me. When I started my warm up I thought...hot damn its a lot colder than I thought it was! My lungs felt like they were frozen there for a little bit. After I got into my groove, my body warmed up, and my breathing fell into place. I set my runkeeper app for 3.5 miles. (Which by the way..this app rocks!) Jumping from 3 to 4 miles next week seems scary to me, so I thought Id go half way to see how it felt. It was hard. Just an extra half mile was a lot hard than I thought. When it was time to stop I was SOOO ready to stop. Heres where the mind over matter thing comes into play. If I HAD to go another half mile...I probably could have. I would of just kept the mind games going that I always have. It goes something like this:

Just run to the tree. That was to easy...how about that bench? Damn girl....I bet you cant make it to that building? Look your half way around now. And you thought you werent a runner? You are making Forest Gump look like a chump now! Than the runkeeper lady would update me on where I was...and Id start the game over. You only have .60 miles left...that means you ran almost 2 miles. Piece of cake...oh wait cake...you cant have a piece unless you go all the way girl!

LOL. Does anyone else do this? Whatever works right? :)

Sometimes I also like to visualize myself to. Running the last mile of a race. My dad cheering me at the finish line. Or someone Im not to fond of is running up ahead, and I pass them. LOL

Mind over matter, people. Mind over matter.

And when your done...your like damn that felt good. That is one of the reasons I love running. I can reach strides I didnt think I could. And when I do reach that stride...the confidence soars.

Running is good for the body and the soul. The End.

Reaching For The Stars

Last night I was searching the interweb for info on Jillian Michaels book, Master Your Metabolism. Someone recently told me she suffered from hypothyroid. I am intrigued.

For the record, I heart Jillian Michaels. <3

I found quite a few reviews on the book, and they all had one thing in common. This book is a must read! Some even said its one of the best health books out there. This is Jillians way of getting out what worked best for her, and if I ever get to that point I think I would want to do the same thing! Im open to reading about anyone with thyroid disease. And it really feels like you have to listen to all the stories out there! Hypothyroidism is such a perplexed disease. Its safe to say that a treatment that works for one person, doesnt always work for the next. Nonetheless, what works for one person could be a step into the right direction to your own healthy being. It can never hurt to try new things to help with your own thyroid disease! Im really interested in hearing her thoughts on hormonal imbalance. This is the part that endocrinologists dont really touch on (at least all the ones Ive been to). And its such a huge part of hypothyroidism, and definitely makes my own journey very complex.

When reading this interview with Jillian Michaels, I had a wonderful aha! moment. I love when I have those! I found this interview in Health magazine's, November issue. This is the question/answer that stuck out to me:

Q: In terms of our fitness efforts, where do we go wrong?

A: We sell ourselves short when it comes to capability and potential. We read on the treadmill. We walk. People will be like, “I’ve been walking.” And I’m like, “Really? Really?” [Laughs.] “OK, you walked to the car, and then to the door at the mall, and then you took the stairs, too? Come on, man.”

If I can take a 66-year-old man and train him six hours a day, six days a week, you can do more than just take the stairs! People have no concept of what the human body is really designed to do. They have no concept of their strength! And they function in a zone that is well below what their potential really is.

This is so true. Ive been at the gym so many times, jump on a piece of equipment for 30 minutes and pat myself on the back like I just completed a marathon. And was that 30 minutes everything I could give it? Was it high intensity? Or was it just a leisure workout? More than likely it was somewhere around leisurely. I am selling myself short. I am not reaching my FULL potential. I'm only cheating myself! (As you can tell Jillian is in my head. ha!)

Go big or go home, right?

I have the odds against me with my thyroid disease in the first place, so yes sir I need to go BIG! Im putting in the time for the workout, so why not push myself to get the most out of my workout? Seems like common sense doesnt it? Than why do we so often NOT do it? Because we think we can't do it? Or maybe because we think simply working out is an accomplishment by itself. But who wants to be mediocre? Not me! Making strides in my workouts gives me confidence. I know this from experience. And I want that feeling back again!

With all that being said, today (dont you love first day of the months?), was my first 60 minute cardio session. I did a 3 mile run and than jumped on the elliptical for 15 minutes. During my run I got all the way up to 5.7mph! Lately Im lucky if I get up to 5 mph. I just kept pushing myself and it felt great! And guess what? I didnt die. I didnt fly off the treadmill. I adapted to it. Amazing what you can do when you just try!

So excited to see where I am at the end of this month!

Not as easy as riding a bike....

We are having a little bit of a heat wave here in Michigan. We had a high of 36 degrees today. I don't know if it ever got that high, but when I got outside it was around 10am and felt pretty balmy.

I decided that I would take advantage of this heat wave and take my run outside today. Now I just recently got back into the running game...and quite honestly its kicking my butt. Seriously. See Homer over there...I felt exactly like that. (And actually I think Ive used that Homer image before! HA!) The treadmill seems just a little bit easier these days. But I loathe the treadmill. So getting outside is good. I need to get use to winter running if I plan on running any races anyways. So out I went.

I got through 2 miles. I felt like I was in super slow motion, like when Will Farrell gets hit in the jugular in Old School. LOL I can definitely tell you that getting back into running is not as easy as riding a bike again. No sir. But it did feel good to have a 2 mile base. I remember when I very first started running a few years ago...30 seconds felt just like 2 miles felt today. Now that is something to reflect on :)

I would like to run a half marathon again...and something that may be happening in April (that I cant mention right now) would definitely motivate me to get in shape. So a half marathon could really be in my future. Right now 13.1 miles seems crazy....but Ive done it before so I know I can do it. One mile at a time.

Acceptance - HYC

So I have come to realize that in the next 3 months I am going to have to learn to accept myself physically for who I am right now. I truly believe that my health is holding me back from having the body I long to have. Although that does sound a little superficial. Its suppose to be about health first, right?

I have been working out for 4-6 days a week for the last month now. I have lost zero pounds. I have lost zero inches. My eating isnt perfect, but it isnt horrible either. For someone working out that much I would think that eating with a few mishaps would be okay. I have been seeing a holistic doctor in addition to my endocrinologist since the beginning of May. I know its a slow process to feeling better but Im not feeling any different. Im still exhausted. Im still fatigued. I simply can not lose any weight.

Do I feel more fit? Yes. Do I feel like Im getting stronger? Yes. So why cant I be happy with that? How come every time I see myself in pictures I get depressed? I avoid pictures at any cost. Which might be difficult to do on my wedding day.....

So I need to love myself. Inside and out. I know theres a 99% chance that I will have the body that I have now on my wedding day. While thats sad, its something I have to deal with. And not let it consume me. I have to accept it. I just keep remembering that first time I tried on my dress. I was maybe 10lbs lighter than I am now, but I can honestly say when I saw myself in the mirror I didnt see the image that I see in pictures now. I truly did feel beautiful. Ill pull out those pictures every now and than (ok maybe more than that. ;p) and I still feel beautiful. I should be happy with that. And I have to keep that in mind.

I need to turn my focus. Maybe focus on weight lifting a bit more. Buff up my arms, shoulder, and back. Accentuate the body parts that my beautiful dress shows off! It doesnt matter what size I am...it matters what the day is about. And that is marrying the man I love. And he has always loved me unconditionally, no matter what size I am. One of the many reasons I love him!

With all that being said, it still is difficult getting to that acceptance point. But I owe it to myself to get to that point!

Derailing Is Not Acceptable - HYC

So its weeks like this that could derail me. I'm very good at the derail game. All or nothing. I use to be good at letting derailing win...and now Im trying to focus on beating the derail.

First it started on Sunday. I slept in till noon from staying out late the night before, and than worked on homework literally the rest of the day. No run. I did go to the gym Monday but had the most crappy workout ever. Today I was blessed with my that dreaded friend of the month, and feel like complete crap. Cramps galore. Migraine Headache. Cravings like you wouldnt believe. I decided to take the day off. Took a nap when I got home, did some housework, and than watched some TV. Ill get back at things tomorrow. Normally this type of start to a week would lead me into a careless attitude. Not to mention Im pretty busy the rest of the week. Lia Sophia show on Thursday, Kid Rock concert on Friday, and a bridal shower on Saturday. Those would be GREAT excuses for me to not workout.

Nope we arent playing that game. I decided to take today off and today only. I can fit in workouts on those other days, except for maybe Thursday. Even than I can throw in a 20 minute Jillian workout, or go for a walk on my lunch break. Its doable, and I will make it work!

I also noticed that Im sort of making the same decisions with my food. I have been consistently working out for a few weeks now. So Ive been trying to pay attention to my food a little bit more. I try to at least make 2 out of 3 meals healthy ones. When Im picking out snacks I really think about them, and not grab for the sugar right away. We shall see how it plays out in a few weeks. All I can keep doing is moving forward and trying. Ill have bad days, but thats normal. Like today, I caved into PB twix and 2 Pepsis. But than I had a healthy dinner after that. Its all about choices. Not letting one bad move mess up the rest of the day.

Im just checking that fatitude at the door! Keeping a positive outlook, focusing on what I can do...not what I cant do, and seeing every "mistake" as an learning opportunity.

Lets see what this week shall bring :)

One of my Ah-ha! Moments - HYC

So you know how you hear a saying a thousand times, but that one time you hear it it finally makes you go, Ah-ha! Dont you love those moments? I think you hear sayings over and over, and sometimes it just sounds like a broken record. You just dont see any meaning to it. But its that one specific time and place that makes that one saying speak to you in a totally different light. I had an ah-ha moment last week. It happened in cycling class.

I was a little nervous since I had not been to cycling class in a few weeks...actually over a month. As we were warming up the instructor said, Surprise! Its interval day. I thought to myself what did I get myself into?! And than he said, to finish off this great workout we will do a 13 minute hill climb standing up. I thought to myself, I hope I just make it the whole 60 minutes! Little did I know would I not only make it 60 minutes, but this workout was just what I needed

I love cycling class. It is the one workout where I feel like I push no matter what. No matter what is on my mind, or what happened earlier that day, or what mind frame Im in...I still push. Its like the one workout class where I literally let all my worries go and get lost in the class. Running is so opposite than that. I can say sometimes when Im done running I do get that great feeling that I consistently get during cycling class, but its not every time. Running is a much more love/hate relationship. Now cycling class is love only. (Sorry running! I still love you!) Everything about the class I love to pieces. The one awesome thing that always sticks out in my mind is that I feel like Im sweating out all those toxins in my body. And boy do I have toxins! When Im done I feel so refreshed and rejuvenated. This time was no different. The feeling came back so quickly, and I thought to myself you need to put cycling higher on your priority list! Oh how Ive missed you!

The intervals went well. Much better than I expected. Why are intervals in cycling so much nicer to me than intervals running? I think its having that bike underneath me or something...I feel more in control or something. Anyhoo....so as we were rounding the last half of the workout we landed into the last 13 minutes. Its all or nothing I thought to myself. Up the resistance went, and up on the bike I went. Our instructor tries to stay quiet so we can all have our zen place. Its a little hard for him but he does a good job. lol And he picks the most perfect music! Which also makes finding your zen a little bit easier. So after a minute or so I found that zen. As hard as your working, it feels just as relaxing as yoga. As strange as that sounds. The instructor told us to push our resistance up a bit, and when I did that I started to feel the intensity at a whole new level. I started to lose focus for a minute and than he said in a very loud, firm voice. YOU ARE IN CONTROL! THE HILL DOES NOT CONTROL YOU! YOU CONTROL THE HILL! That kept replaying through my head as I pushed out those last 5 minutes. When I was done....I pretty much had the cycling high. Does that happen or did I make that up? Anyways I felt fanfuckingtastic!

So as I carried out the rest of my week, whether it was a work stress situation, a workout I was trying to avoid, or even when making some of my food choices.....that saying replayed in my head again. You are in control! I found an ah-ha! moment. Dont you love those? I havent had one of those in a long time, so I got really geeked over it :) You are in control....such a simple phrase, yet it never really struck a cord with me before. Seriously, I control all my actions. I determine my fate. Im in control!

So glad I went to that cycling class. Another reason I need to go to class more often!

One Focus For Now - HYC

So I havent checked in with the Healthy You Challenge in quite sometime. Its way overdue. Sadly I dont have any progress to really report. I just keep playing this game with myself, and I dont know why. I can say Im going to make a change, but I find something to hold me back. Sometimes I think I dont deserve it.

But I do deserve it. So what I did decide was to focus on one thing, and that was going to be running. I know Ill see improvements with running, and I know seeing progress is what I need. I really loved the way I felt when I was running before, and often long for that feeling. Im only into my second week on this "change". But Im happy to report I stuck to my 3 days of running, and also did 2 days of cross training. I want to minimum run 3 days a week. I figure that I can stick to, and everything else is a bonus. We all have to start somewhere.

I did notice last week what works gym wise for me. I wasnt carpooling because we had to take furlough weeks, so I packed my gym bag everyday and went directly to the gym after work. Only one day did I really have to force myself, kicking and screaming, to go there. And I always felt fantastic afterwards. Now when I carpool this does make going directly to the gym from work a little bit more difficult. But I have to make it work. Recently, Ive found myself hitting a rut of depression, and exercise is essential when Im like this. It really does help my mood. I have to just keep that in mind.

Ive seen a lot of pictures of myself lately, and am disgusted on who I see. I dont see myself as that person in the photos. Especially when Im running. I do feel somewhat fit, but look so unfit. Its depressing. I know my food is to blame. I can not get it under control. I figure Ill stick to my workout goals for now, and than slowly work on my food issues.

So yeah thats it in a nutshell. Consistenty with running. That I can do.

HYC - Week 14

Helllllloooooo out there :) Ive been MIA. Some good times some not so good times. But Im hanging in there. The new gym is up and running and more classes are being added every week. So Im trying a little bit of this and little bit of that. The classes are fun. And Im definitely getting great workouts in everything I try. And let me tell you....going to these workout classes with these rooms surrounded by mirrors on three sides is GREAT MOTIVATION! When your staring at yourself and thinking damn that is me? That cant be me! I have work to do! Its not a fun thing to look at, or to come to realize yes girl you have gotten off track.

Ive also added in some running again. I was able to run 35 minutes/2.75 miles on my first run back. I was very pleased with that! Ive found two races that I would like to run. One is a 5k on May 2nd, and the other is a 10k on May 30th. I haven't signed up yet. But have them in mind. Ill see how the next few weeks pan out running wise.

And I think I may try the cycling class at the gym. I hear great things about it, and how although I may feel like Im going to die...Ill feel great in the end. I have to admit I love those type of workouts. Im feeling good about working out. Now just need to get my food in check more often. I have six months left till the wedding and it is totally doable to reach my goal.

Healthy Reflections - HYC Week 10

So I always get these Healthy Reflection emails from Sparkpeople.com. They really get me thinking, and I received one in my inbox that I thought was perfect to blog about this week.

Who is standing in your way?

Something we were withholding made us weak, until we found it was ourselves. - Robert Frost

Imagine someone regularly tying small weights around your ankles as you try to climb a mountain. Doesn't sound fair, does it? But that's exactly what you can do to yourself, a little bit at a time, if you don't watch out. When you think of who and what is standing in the way of your dreams, it's easy to forget your own responsibility. Even the best of us can be guilty of unknowingly hurting our own progress. Procrastination, lateness, being disorganized, pessimism, not being honest with yourself, severe self-criticism, downplaying achievements, focusing only on weaknesses while ignoring strengths, keeping goals a secret, demanding perfection, giving up after a small setback--these are all ways you can make it tough to be (and do) your best. Smart systems, the right attitude, and a promise to keep going no matter what will make a world of difference.

Wow, seriously sparkpeople should let me know when they are hanging out inside my head! Its like they were calling me out. Every single thing they named seems to be me to a tee lately. And actually just before I decided to blog tonight the one thing on the top of the list is procrastination! Ive known about this paper Ive had to write since classes started in January, and the rough draft was postponed 2 weeks, yet I still havent started it. Actually Ive tried but just sit and stare at a blank screen. So I blogged instead. Procrastination at its best.

Lately Im so unorganized that it causes so much chaos for me. But I created it, no one else. I complain about people holding me up from being late, but than Im late myself. But I hardly will ever admit that to myself. The energy it takes to find the negativity in everything has definitely been wearing me down. And giving up seems to be my mantra lately. Since when did I give in so easily? Im a fighter, and love to feel like one! So who has taking over my body? I have news for them....I want the Melissa I know back.

Im in charge. Im ready to act like Im in charge. No more of this choosing who to blame. Im the only one to blame. I shall take responsibility. And for goodness sakes, no more negativity. No more focusing on my weakness. No more being so unsure of myself. Because where is it getting me? Absolutely nowhere! I have recommitted myself this week to my healthy lifestyle. To eating better, treating my body better, and being nicer to myself. If I hit a roadblock, so what! It makes the journey so much more worth it in the end. I owe it to myself to keep moving forward.

Smart systems, the right attitude, and a promise to keep going no matter what will make a world of difference. Sounds like great things to work on this week. First Ill start by getting to bed at a decent hour. So that will be my cue to say goodnight ;)

Healthy You Check In - Week 9

First let me give a HUGE thanks to all of you that posted a comment on my last blog. It helped so much. And I'm taking all of your advice to heart. This week small goals. I'm putting to much pressure on myself and than beating myself up because I cant meet my own expectations!

I cant believe its already week 9. And its sad to think of where I am, and where I could be. But no time to dwell on a shoulda, coulda, woulda. Each day gives me a new opportunity to improve. And I have to keep that positive outlook.

I have some great news! LA Fitness officially opens on Thursday! WOOOHOOOO! I think that is going to be a HUGE help! I know a few friends are planning on doing the classes there, so Ill plan to meet them and there I have my accountability.

I'm still feeling in a funk (although that could be a case of the Mondays), but Im definitely feeling a brighter outlook coming on.

Thank you again for your support....you pulled me up right when I needed it. XO

What Does It Take?

Im falling down a slippery slope again. Ive been down this road before, many many times before. I knew it was coming, but still didnt prepare for it. I was doing so well, and feeling so great...that I knew it was going to hit me soon. What does it take to get back on track? What does it take to stay on track?

I would say that I feel off the wagon probably about two weeks ago. Right around Valentines Day. It was the monthly anniversary of my dads passing, which Im noticing hits me a few days after that actual day. And Valentines day reminded me of him since the Dirty Show was in town. Its this art show he would go to every year. Grant and I have been going through a rough patch as well, and things were pretty tense in the household. Im also finding it really hard to fall into a schedule that works for me. With school, studying, work, lia sophia shows, dogs, Grant, and my social life...I just cant fit everything in. I need to re-evaluate that as well...

So of course what did I do? Eat whatever the hell I wanted. Stopped exercising. Because that will always help my situation right? *smacks myself upside the head* Exercising and eating healthy are positives in any situation, especially in situations like Ive recently been having. I know that, but why cant I get it? Its like I love to self sabotage myself because I dont think I dont deserve it or something.

So now my weight is right back up to where I was January 1st. Nice. Im still eating fast food daily, drinking way to much pop, and eating sweets like they are going out of style. I need to stop this madness. Now. I think about going wedding dress shopping (I even found my dream dress!), yet that is still not a motivator to me? Its in 7 months which is not a long time! Is anything a motivator? Doesnt seem like it.

My plan to run in the half marathon flying pig is thrown out the window. I just dont want the stress of the training plan right now, and not sure if I could fit in runs as often as Id like. Im on the look for another race, maybe just a 10k? I need the accountability, and running is the one cardio I stick with. Im hoping once this LA Fitness opens that will help to, but the date keeps getting moved back. Which is pretty frustrating. Now the open date is March 7th. Originally it was February 16th.

This is my cry for help.

HYC - Week 4 - Take the bad with the good...

This past week wasn't my greatest week. I gained 1.4lbs, which considering some of the stuff I ate isn't to bad. Im finding that when Im out at restaurants its really hard to make good choices. I think first of all there isnt that many healthy options, and also that I feel a little rushed so just make a quick decision, which is usually an unhealthy one. I also have been indulging in the fruity, ice cream alcoholic drinks, which we all know is not a smart choice!

So Im on a mission. To conquer eating out. Well maybe not conquer it just yet, but at least make some strides in being successful in my choices. I plan to research restaurants online before I get there. I will have more time to find a healthier options. I also plan to make up my own meal. I don't necessarily have to chose what they have on the menu, I can mix and match. I also am putting a stop to the fruity drinks. If I want, I can enjoy a lite beer. If you have any other suggestions on how to be successful eating out, Id love to hear them!

I mentioned before how I am doing a support group in regards to my healthy lifestyle with some friends as well. Well when you gain weight you get a pig sticker on our graph. I got one this week, and 2 other girls did to. We have made a pact that when we are out together we are to help each other make healthier choices, we were doing the complete opposite!

So Ill have good weeks, and Ill have bad weeks. Its just part of the game. Its what I do after those bad days, and bad weeks that matter. Brush myself off, and keep on moving. The bad eating went hand in hand with lack of exercise last week, so I have committed to only 2 rest days, no matter what this week. Re-focusing, its gets a little bit easier every time ;)

HYC - Week 3 - Realizations

I had a FANTASTIC week! One of those weeks where you are pumped to jump on that scale. And it was down 2.4 pounds. WOOHOO! I really focused this week - on what I ate, and consistency on my workouts. And it paid off.

Ive come to a few realizations this week. Things I knew in the back of my head, but either was ignoring them, or maybe didnt truly believe them. The first one is exercising definitely helps depression. I would say that I currently have a mild case of depression that phases in and out from day to day. Usually Im depressed so dont want to work out. Id rather just be depressed. Well this week I really focused, and said I can give a 20 minute workout. It is just 20 minutes. So Ive been doing the Jillian Michaels DVD 30 Day Shred, that I talked about last week. (Im ready to move to level 2 today, by the way...traveling pushups here I come!) She really pushes you hard in those 20 minutes and I think its just what I needed. I worked out 5 times last week, and could feel how happy I was each day. It was really noticeable because Ill admit, happiness is not a thing I feel often these days. I like that feeling, so I wanted to do the workouts each day. I also liked being pushed by Jillian so I looked forward to trying harder with each workout. The crazy thing is I knew this is what exercise would do, but avoided it. Taking control of my happiness, that is exactly what Im doing. Being sad all the time can be exhausting.

Another thing I realized this week is support is a partial factor to my success. I need the accountability. I also need the tough love. And I got just that! Ill never eat another tator tot in my life! I got reamed a good one on that! When I have to report in what Im eating, my workouts, and what I weigh...it definitely is making the world of difference. Just being able to talk to friends about my struggles, and hear they are having the same struggles is really helpful. Also hearing what works for one person, and how it may just work for me is a bonus. Im so thankful for the support I have during this journey, because it definitely keeps me going on those bad days!

I havent felt this geeked about exercising and eating in a long time. It feels awesome. I cant wait to see what the upcoming weeks bring. Hopefully melted snow and warmer temps so I can start running outside! That half marathon is coming up sooner than I think! And I have a time to beat!

While the last 8 months have been a whirlwind of emotions, I have definitely fallen off track. On my mental and physical health. Enough is enough. Its time to take back control. I deserve to be happy, and my dad would want that! Sure Ill have pitfalls along the way, but Ill just brush myself off and go back at it again. Growth...its an amazing thing, dont you think?

HYC Week 2 - Focus

Another week has gone by, and I lost .80. Its all good. Something is better than nothing! I was fighting off a cold this week, so stayed home from work for a few days. And thats always an eating disaster. I finally got to offset the bad eating with a few workouts on the weekend, so was happy the way the week ended.

There is a new LA Fitness opening a few miles from my house. I went and checked out what I could (just a small office is open with billboards of the facility), and the rates are great. I wasnt sticker shocked at all! Im going to wait a few more weeks and see if they give even better rates. But defitenly signing up. This facility is HUGE! Swimming pool, 2 floors of cardio and weight machines, basketball court, aerobic room, spinning has its own room, and 3 or 4 racquet ball courts. No contract, and all classes are included in the monthly price. Sweet! Im super excited about the grand opening, which isnt for another month. So to tie me over till than, I picked up the Jillian Michaels DVD - 30 Day Shred. Ive heard some great reviews on this DVD, and always love a good Jillian workout.

This DVD has 3 levels, 2o minute workout on each level. You start at level one and when you feel your ready move on to level 2. Its only a 2o minute workout but its a high intensity circuit style workout. Each level has 3 circuits. 3 minutes of strengthening, 2 minutes of cardio, and 1 minute of abs. And she doesnt let you rest either! I started it today, and I made it through level 1, panting but I made it :) Im excited to move on to level 2 in the upcoming weeks!

Wedding dress body....here I COME!

Im still struggling with my food, but Im definitely more aware of my choices. And taking baby steps everyday. Being conscious of what I put in my mouth, and being held accountable for it definitely helps! I got ripped a good one at our Sunday weigh in. Tough love by some friends, got to love it. Im so not being the one who gets put on blast next week!

I can feel that fire building in me. Im feeling motivated, and looking forward to a healthy year! I havent felt this in a long time, so I hope its here to stay. At least for a little while :)

HYC Week 1 - New Year

Well I made it through the holidays, and came out in one piece! LOL Im happy to say that I maintained my weight, which is a huge bonus thinking back on the foods I shoveled into my mouth!

Something about the New Year always feels refreshing to me. New Year, New Goals, New Beginnings. I know a lot of people look at New Years resolutions as so cliche. But Im so drawn to them. I still am working on what new goals I will have this year, but will post them once they are complete.

Some friends and I have started a little weight watchers type group. We are meeting every Sunday morning to weigh in together. And than we have a little meeting to go over any troubles we are having, and support each other. I think the accountability of the group, along with the great supportive healthy you challengers...this has to be my year!

HYC Check In - Building Blocks

This week was definitely a better week than last. Of course I still have room for improvement, but as long as Im improving each week than I am a happy girl.

I took the advice of my great support system of Healthy You participants, and focused on point A, instead of point C, mini goals. So I went back to the basics on working out. I dusted off my good old work out DVDs. I forgot how great those DVD's can be. And how sore it made me! Ive been working on a 45 minute workout, and I have gotten through 30 minutes of it. So this week Id like to complete the entire 45 minute workout. As far as eating, I focused on portion size, not taking seconds, and eating one healthy meal a day. I had to catch myself a few times, but amazing what sitting for 15 minutes can do...realizing, hey I dont need that second helping.

I had a Christmas party I went to, and I succeed at one plate there, but did indulge a bit on mini portions of a few deserts. Not a success but its all a learning process. Each situation helps aid in how to handle it next time. Its just making sure I implement that, and telling my inner demon that I deserve to be healthy!

So as I stepped on the scale today, I lost 2 pounds! WOOHOO! That feels like such a small victory to me since this week I was faced with the anniversary of my dads passing. This time of the month, every month since my dad has passed, has been such a hard, hard time. And usually I turn to eating.

So this week I started laying the blocks down. And each week Ill keep building blocks. Sometimes a few blocks might fall down (probably a little more than Id like!), but I wont let it get me down. Ill just rebuild them, and build on top of them :)

I Need More Consistency - A Healthy You Check In

So I had a rough first week. I dont know what my deal is. Do I not care enough? Do I not want it enough? Do I not think Im good enough? I wish I had the answers to those questions.

Ive been in such a funk lately. All I want to do is lounge around the house, and than I make up all these excuses to justify why Im so lazy. I know what I need to do, but I dont do it. I keep eating like crap, drinking like crap, feeling like crap...what do I need to do to want to make a change?

I only made it out for one run this past week, mostly due to the snow and dropping temps. This year Im such a baby about running outside. Seriously. I ran through the entire winter last year. I do think we had a much more mild winter last year. And it really didnt get as cold as it is now until January and only lasted a few weeks. The desire to run in the cold is just not there this year. I dont have a gym membership right now, due to financial reasons. But I did see that they are opening a LA Fitness a few miles away. I want to check it out and see if they have any good deals going on. Ive heard that its a little expensive...but its a month to month contract which is always a plus to me :) I also got something in the mail from Bally's trying to recruit old members. $99 for a year! Cant be that. I wonder what the catches are though. Either way, I need to budget in a gym membership because Im just not the type that will workout at home as often as I should!

One thing I have learned through my yo-yo dieting experience is that consistency is the key. I need to be more consistent. Even if I start off with something small like being active 15 minutes a day, a few times a week. Or maybe focus on consistency by having 2 out of 3 healthy meals a day. Small consistent goals.

I guess Im having a hard time with the grief and depression. Im really letting it consume me in a unhealthy way. I need to find a balance. Allowing a period for the sadness, and than move forward. Instead Im letting it consume me whole, which is leading to very unhealthy habits. So one goal for this upcoming week....I will blog about my sad feelings, and when I hit submit the grief period is over. I will than follow up with an healthy activity that make me happy. I also think Ill stick to the 2 out of 3 good meals a day. Im open to any suggestions to!

I will have a better week 2 :)

My First Healthy You Check In - My Story

So this is my first Healthy You check in :) I was pretty excited when I discovered the Healthy You challenge. I always find that having a support group like this one, is so beneficial! This is something I definitely need right now. More than ya'll would ever know!

Also, thank you for all the warm welcomes :) I cant wait to get know all of you better, and provide support where I can!

So I have been known to be quite the yo yo dieter in my years. Ive always been overweight, and a few years back I decided to do something about it. So I joined www.ediets.com, and went full force. In about 6 months I successfully lost 35 pounds. I was in the best shape ever. I was also training for my first Breast Cancer 3 Day walk that year. Well shortly after my walk, I kept eating like I was training but was not exercising at all. Before I knew it, I had gained back all the weight I lost and continued to put more on.

Well last year I topped off my highest weight ever at 175. For a 5'4" woman, I was really putting a risk on my health. At that time I also started to experience thyroid problems, and was diagnosed with Graves Disease. I went through a radioactive iodine treatment for the Graves disease. My thyroid was working almost 6 times above the normal level so I was to jittery to do anything, especially exercise. The treatment essentially is suppose to kill your thyroid cells through your bloodstream to either A. bring my thyroid to a normal level, or B. burn my thyroid completely out. While we were hoping it would bring it down to a normal level, I got the latter. It completely burned my thyroid out. I was than medicated with a thyroid replacement pill. And I finally was feeling somewhat normal again. Around this time I also was approved to get a breast reduction, something I had waited for most of my life.

After I was healed from the surgery, I told myself Im going to make that healthier me change. Things were starting to work better for me in the health department, and what time was better than the present. One of my goals after my surgery was to run a half marathon. So I started off a running program, couch to 5k. I ran my first 5k last Thanksgiving, than a 4 miler on NYE, than a 10k in March, and than my half in May. The running was the best exercise for me, it taught me how to love to workout. Something I didnt think was possible! lol I also felt a feeling that I never thought I would feel. And that was feeling like an athlete. A healthy me! One of the most amazing feelings ever. I lost a total a total of 40lbs at that point.

Than two weeks after my half marathon I was dealt one of the hardest things in my life. My dad passed away from a massive heart attack. While Ive been trying to heal, and go through the grieving process, its been very difficult for me. And Ive been an emotional eater most of my life, so that is one of the things I have turned to in the last 6 months. So I have found myself back in that familiar spot again. 25-30 lbs heavier than I was back in May. Ive really been trying to gain momentum and refocus myself on that healthier lifestyle I know. I definitely recognize my battle with food, and figure that if anytime to get a grip on emotional eating...this time in my life is when is the best time to conquer that.

Its really hard right now to not only dealing with the emotional eating, but not letting grief take over me. Its easy to sit in front of the couch and watch tv. Its easy to give into grief and let it consume me. But I dont want the easy way out. I dont like feeling uncomfortable in my own skin. Not only for me, but I want to do this for my dad. I need to find my way back to that healthier lifestyle road and stay there. Im tired of history repeating its self. It doesnt need to. History can stay there, in the past!

So Ive been making baby steps. I stopped running after my half with everything that happened. So I told myself I would get back into running. So I meet a friend 3 times a week to go running. Its feels great to get back into it. Although I can say, it defintely isnt as easy as riding a bike! I look forward to maybe doing another half marathon in the Spring. My eating habits have always been my downfall, and that is where I struggle the most. Sugar, fast food, and pop...3 of my very bad habits. I really want to learn how to consistently eat healthier, and want to make those healthier choices over the not so healthy choices.

So my goals this first full week into the challenge. No fast food. Sounds simple right? We shall see. I also would like to add in one toning workout in addition to my 3 running days. I took before pictures (I hate those!), measurements, and am ready to go. So healthy me...here I come!

Healthy You Challenge

So as I was going through my daily ritual of catching up on blogs I follow, and I fell upon a blog, scalejunkie.com. The post she wrote that day had a poem that had me cracking up, and loving it at the same time. (Ill post the poem soon) I noticed a link on her blog to this Healthy You Challenge she started. So I read up on this challenge, and the FAQ, and thought...this is EXACTLY what Im looking for!

I was blogging with a weight loss community similar to this, but it really has faded out over the last few months. I could use some accountability, and support really bad right now.

The Healthy You Challenge is an ongoing challenge from January 1st 2008 - December 31st 2008. Anyone can join at anytime. This challenge is all about making a healthier you. So you make the goals you want to achieve. Everyone has different goals, and this community is there to support you along the way. Heres a tidbit on what its all about...

What is encouraged and celebrated:

• Pounds lost
• Exercise - according to your limitations and doctors recommendations
  
• Stay on YOUR healthy eating plan
• Non Scale Victories
• Goal setting
• Rewarding yourself
• Challenging yourself
• Supporting other bloggers with similar goals, even if they aren't a part of the challenge
• Asking for help when you feel discouraged

So there is a check in post every Tuesday. You just blog about how your week went. What ups and downs you had on the journey to a healthier you. Than link that post on the Healthy You blog, and go support others that have posted their links to. Sounds pretty awesome eh? I thought so :)

So on Thursday (Ironically on Thanksgiving. lol), I emailed the originator, Diana, and said Id love to join. I know I only have a month left of the 2008 challenge, but sounds like they are going to continue into 2009. So yay to that! Im excited to be part of this community, and continue on my ongoing journey to a healthier me!