Christmas Music - Can I Handle It?

My favorite holiday hands down is Christmas. Crazy eh? I have always loved everything about it. I love the holiday season. I love the brisk cold air, the snow falling, the decorations, hot chocolate, decorating the tree, finding that perfect gift, and of course Christmas music.

So every year I look forward to the day that they start to play the Christmas music. Usually right after Halloween. I love it. Call me a weirdo if you like, but it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. It makes me happy. I can listen to it all the way through the end of December, and not get sick of it either. Over and Over. Im sure it drives Grant bonkers.

Ironically I have met my soul mate in the Christmas spirit/music loving area. A friend of mine, D, also loves it. I love this girl, and the more I get to know her the more I am like...where has this friend been all my life?! Crazy enough shes been down the street for the last 8 years but we never knew it! lol

But Christmas music is a little different this year. I still got that excited feeling I always get when I hear it for the first time of the season. But as I listen to it, tears welled up in my eyes. It reminds me of my dad. A lot. I remember him always playing it in the car, and singing along. Not only is it just the music, but now the words are so much more intense to me. The meaning behind them is so different than they use to be. Sometimes it sounds like my dad is singing to me. I honestly dont know if I can handle listening to the Christmas music for another 1.5 months. It reminds me of the holidays, and how he wont be around. (Or any of my family for that matter.) But it also makes me smile remembering the Christmases me had together. I guess you have to take the good with the bad sometimes.

Thats my dad with one of his favorite gifts last year. Love how it has a pocket for his remote? :-)

One memory that has been sticking out is riding in the jeep, listening to Christmas music, and driving around to check out everyones Christmas lights. We havent done it together in years...but I remember it like it was yesterday. I wish I had one more season of that.

Its defintely going to be a tough holiday season. But if I keep remembering the good memories, hopefully it will ease the sadness of my dad physically not being here. Ill embrace the Christmas music, and imagine my dad is right there listening to it with me. Because in spirit he really is.

I miss you so much dad!