Holiday Workout Challenge

Hiatuses are overrated dont you think? Ive missed my blog! :)

So a friend of mine invited me to join a Holiday Workout Challenge on Facebook. Its an 8 week challenge from November 1st to December 26th. Each participant made individual goals they would like to meet, and we also committed to 30 minute workouts, 5 days a week. And if you follow all the rules there is even an drawing to win some fitness prizes. And its FREE to participate. Pretty cool eh?

I wasnt sure how I would do with 5 days of workouts. That is a large commitment especially with my school and work schedule. Not to mention that before the challenge my workouts were very inconsistent. But I was up for the challenge. Especially anything that keeps me motivated through the holidays!

Here are the goals I made:

• I am committing to 5 days of workouts, with 3 of those running.
• Drop one size, and stay off the scale!
• Scale down my pop intake! Im going to start off with one 20 ounce every other day, and hope to be at zero by the end of the challenge!

I have to admit I got off to a rocky start. Than again I was on vacation that first week of the challenge. So tried not to stress to much about it. When I got back it did take a couple of weeks, but once I said enough is enough, I gave it everything I could. I finally had some motivation to get to those 5:45am cycling classes! And now I cant see starting off my Monday and Wednesday mornings any other way! On other days I have been running or doing a circuit/strength training DVD at home. I'm happy to say that I am now in my fourth week of 5 day workouts! It really does feel like part of my day now. Its a habit! I never thought I would be saying that. I just feel healthier. I haven't dropped much weight, but that's okay. Because I feel thinner. I feel stronger. I feel like I'm making better choices. And that's what its all about!

Now that pop goal...yeah that hasn't been going so great. So I think for these last few weeks Ill really try to focus on that a little bit better ;)

Battery Low!

Oh the ups and downs of running....how Ive missed you. Im trying so so hard to get back into running, as challenging as it is! Ill dont think Ill every truly understand how one day it feels so effortless, and another day it feels so hard! All part of the love/hate relationship I suppose.

Today I went out for a run, and was hoping to push out a 5k. Its a beautiful day here in Michigan. Near 70's, sun is shining, wind is low....you dont get many of these days in late October! Perfect running weather right? Not exactly. My legs were feeling a little sore from my strength training session yesterday....so I wasn't sure how far Id be able to go. Once I started running my legs were definitely feeling a bit fatigued. I could barely get out 1.3 miles before I chose to walk. And wouldnt you know at that moment my Garmin than beeps at me, battery low. I thought...you aren't kidding! lol The next mile was a combination of walking and running. Which Im okay with. Not my favorite runs, but I know these days happen. It isnt the first time, and it wont be the last!

You win some you lose some. I pushed through it, and gave it what I got...sometimes thats all you can do! Next time I have one of those effortless runs...Ill appreciate it more than ever!

Corktown St. Patrick 5K

Well I did it! I ran in my first race since my half marathon in 2008. And it felt great!!!! It was exactly what I needed :)

The weather all week was beautiful! Than the weekend came and the rain started. Bleh. The day of the race was exactly that. Cold, wet, and windy! All the elements you dont want. But I didnt let it stop me, I still headed downtown. I got there a little early so just chilled in my car for a bit. Entertained myself with some bejeweled blitz. Im so addicted to that! About 45 minutes before the race started I ventured out. I tried to find my friend, Lynette, but didnt have much luck.

When everyone started to line up it was a bit of a cluster. I ended up about 3/4 back which is a perfect spot for me. I bounced in spot for awhile as I froze my butt off. My hands were numb with gloves on! I started to get a little anxious for those 10 minutes before the race started. Next thing I knew we were off. It took me a few minutes to get across the start line....I think there was around 4000 runners/walkers. I got a little excited in the moment and started off to fast. I could feel it about a quarter mile in. Oops! I adjusted after that, and felt like I fell into a good stride. Shortly after that I really started to sweat it out. So I attempted to take off my jacket, but than realized my iphone was zipped in my coat pocket and it pulled out my head phones. I fought with my jacket for a bit and than gave in and just had one head phone in. lol Than I ran into quite a few walkers that must have started in the middle of the pack. That was a bit annoying because I had to stop and walk to get around them. I wish they would of stayed to the side. There were also a few people running with big dogs and really big strollers. So that was a bit of an obstacle to. I just weaved in and out where I could, but was careful of the uneven road. The last thing I needed was a sprained ankle!

I reached the halfway point at a pace that Ive been managing the last couple months, so was pretty happy with that, considering the weather conditions! When the buildings got sparse I could start to feel the wind more. Speaking of weather conditions, I than realized it wasn't raining anymore :) The turn around point was really small, it could only fit about 5 people wide, so it could a bit congested. Im not sure if it was the turn around or the runners though... After the turn around I just took everything in. The race, the people, the costumes, the crowd, the sights, the energy! I love running in races. I was getting a bit winded, and had a really bad side stitch, so focused a bit on my breathing for the last mile. I rounded the last corner with a second wind, and crossed the finish line around 34 minutes. I wanted to come in under 35 so was pretty excited :)

A few minutes later I ran into Grants coworker, so chatted with her a bit. Than grabbed some water, which was a short line since everyone was in line for a beer. Ha! I went back to wait for Lynette to come across the finish line. I saw her after the turn around so knew she wasnt that far behind me. Ended up that I missed her. LOL But we met up at the results board. I was so proud of her! It was her first 5k, and she did awesome!

I checked the board and my time was 31:17! I was ecstatic! Only 3o seconds away from a PR. Not bad at all. My best 5k pace this year! It felt great to be around other runners, and definitely has me motivated to keep running. Even with the love/hate relationship I have with running, the feeling after a race is all worth it! To be accomplishing things I never thought I could is priceless.

I think Ill sign up for my next race in April. Maybe find one on my birthday :)

Happy Valentines Day!

My day started off wonderful. I slept a good 10 hours! Grant got up with the dogs, and I got a few extra hours of beauty sleep. I guess I got my Valentines wish eh? LOL

We than exchanged our first Husband and Wife Valentines Day Cards. Awww, I love my husband. He picks out the sweetest, most perfect cards ever! Married life is wonderful!

Grant went to run some errands, so I went and got my run out of the way. Today on the training plan was 4 miles. I was a little worried about how the run would go because of how bad my knees have been aching. But I wore some nice cushion socks, and took my pace down a bit. Not the best time, but Im not so worried about time right now. More like just getting through the runs! My first week of half marathon training went pretty good. It feels great to be in a routine again. Something about training for an event really changes your outlooks on your workouts. I know there were a few days when I would of skipped the workout...but since Im training now it wasnt even a possibility to me. I cant believe Im in training again...and that Im going to run a half again. Exciting, and nerve wrecking at the same time! When I got back home I decided I would head out to the grocery store and pick up something to make for desert. Grant is cooking dinner and its half a surprise. So I wanted to make our desert a surprise to. We thought we would see if there was a movie we could rent while out, so stopped at the video store. But there wasnt anything we saw at the video store, so decided to come home and download a few episodes of Big Love. We only got through one episode since we lost track of time...so looking forward to catching up on more Big Love this week! Grant was on dinner duty, and boy did he bring it! I think he really outdid himself this time. It was absolutely delicious. We had steaks, redskin mashed potatoes, green beans w/ ham and garlic, and a very yummie arugla salad.
See Bandito trying to get my meal? Sneaky bastard! My belly is VERY full! Will we have room for my desert? Im sure we can make room for a small piece. I made peanut butter cheesecake...hope it turned out good!

Our first married Valentines has been fabulous! I hope your enjoying yours as well!

Happy Valentines Day!

Widgets Galore!

After Meg's suggestion on tracking my workouts on my blog, I decided to revisit a site where I use to do just that. I was pleasantly surprised by the makeover that daily mile had! Although I can say I enjoyed the site before the upgrades, and now its just an extra bonus!

When I started using the Run Keeper App on my phone I didnt really need to use daily mile anymore. So I thought. The run keeper can track runs and walks, but it didnt track other types of exercise. So I think Ill use both :) I added the "workouts", widget. This shows my latest workout, miles ran this week, and total miles ran. I wish I could start the counter back to zero for total miles ran. Id prefer to just track this year. But to do that I think I would have to delete my previous workouts, which I dont want to do. I did add a section to track my miles ran this year, along with my PR's. I started the yearly count from when I started using the run keeper app, which was mid January. I think most workouts done before that were just a mile here or there anyways. I figure losing 2 weeks in January isnt that many lost miles anyways. ;-) Guess this is where I learn my lesson of why I should of kept up with daily mile. LOL

There was this widget on daily mile that had a countdown to your race, but its in blue and I couldnt get the color changed..or get it to fit right on my blog. So I used the race schedule widget instead. Than I added a countdown, so two widgets in the place of what the one widget did. Im not to crazy about the orange on the daily mile widgets...but I cant change the color. And I need to stop being so anal. LOL

Than the most fun widget...the donut meter! Daily mile tracks the calories I burn, and it shows how many donuts Ive earned, or could of burned off with those calories! Love it!

Dont you just love widgets? I know I can be such a dork.

Going Strong

Despite feeling a little off physically this week, Im still going strong! I usually can tell when my thyroid level is low, and usually Ill just sleep, sleep, and sleep some more. But Ive decided to do just the opposite. Regardless of how tired or exhausted I am, I still am trying to stick to my workout plan. So far, so good. Im right on schedule.

It feels good to be on a regular active schedule. Not only does it help my moods and release stress, but I can feel myself getting more fit. Sure not every workout feels top notch, but every workout gives me more confidence! Im half looking at myself in the mirror these days. :) Im experiencing, one again, the ups and downs of workouts. I love that great workout where I feel I can conquer the world. And those struggling workouts are just as great to. When I push through those barriers, I again feel on top of the world. My run today was like that. My legs have been achy, especially my knees. And it felt like I could feel every step through my entire body. When I got to 2 miles I just didnt know how Id make it another mile. Than the music carried me through once again. I was listening to some techno, Beckers and Hatfield....a track called Excuses (Weekend Heros Remix), and it just picked me up.




Techno never lets me down! Seriously its like it knew I needed to hear it at that point. A light bulb clicked, and I picked up the pace. At one point I wanted to just start pumping my fists in the air. Ahhh, dont you just love music?! It got me through that last mile...and I felt fanfuckingtastic when I was done. Now Im really exhausted...guess who will be getting a good nights sleep tonight?! Im sure Ill sleep like a baby :)

Weigh in was yesterday, and I was down 1.5 lbs. Not to shabby. I was happy to see a loss, after last weeks weigh in.

But still only 1.5 lbs in two weeks isnt anything to scream off the top of the mountain. My food needs some serious improvement. That combined with my workouts...I could seem some great results! I need to get a plan in place to work on that....

Well thats all she wrote folks. Time for bed.

Mind Over Matter

Running that is. I would say that after you get a base of a 3 mile run going...it truly is a game of mind over matter.

Today I had my last "practice run". Ive been working on building up a base so I could jump into my half marathon training. The first week of the training plan has me running 2 as my shortest run, and 4 as my longest. Ive worked myself up to 3 miles, and running 3 times a week. So I think Im ready to start the training program. EEK!

So today I decided you better take it outside girl. You cant train every run on a treadmill so get use to the freezing temps now! The sun was shining, and when I was outside earlier in the day it felt decent out. So I layered up and headed to my running spot, a bike path about 10 minutes from my house. Its the safest spot for me. When I started my warm up I thought...hot damn its a lot colder than I thought it was! My lungs felt like they were frozen there for a little bit. After I got into my groove, my body warmed up, and my breathing fell into place. I set my runkeeper app for 3.5 miles. (Which by the way..this app rocks!) Jumping from 3 to 4 miles next week seems scary to me, so I thought Id go half way to see how it felt. It was hard. Just an extra half mile was a lot hard than I thought. When it was time to stop I was SOOO ready to stop. Heres where the mind over matter thing comes into play. If I HAD to go another half mile...I probably could have. I would of just kept the mind games going that I always have. It goes something like this:

Just run to the tree. That was to easy...how about that bench? Damn girl....I bet you cant make it to that building? Look your half way around now. And you thought you werent a runner? You are making Forest Gump look like a chump now! Than the runkeeper lady would update me on where I was...and Id start the game over. You only have .60 miles left...that means you ran almost 2 miles. Piece of cake...oh wait cake...you cant have a piece unless you go all the way girl!

LOL. Does anyone else do this? Whatever works right? :)

Sometimes I also like to visualize myself to. Running the last mile of a race. My dad cheering me at the finish line. Or someone Im not to fond of is running up ahead, and I pass them. LOL

Mind over matter, people. Mind over matter.

And when your done...your like damn that felt good. That is one of the reasons I love running. I can reach strides I didnt think I could. And when I do reach that stride...the confidence soars.

Running is good for the body and the soul. The End.

Reaching For The Stars

Last night I was searching the interweb for info on Jillian Michaels book, Master Your Metabolism. Someone recently told me she suffered from hypothyroid. I am intrigued.

For the record, I heart Jillian Michaels. <3

I found quite a few reviews on the book, and they all had one thing in common. This book is a must read! Some even said its one of the best health books out there. This is Jillians way of getting out what worked best for her, and if I ever get to that point I think I would want to do the same thing! Im open to reading about anyone with thyroid disease. And it really feels like you have to listen to all the stories out there! Hypothyroidism is such a perplexed disease. Its safe to say that a treatment that works for one person, doesnt always work for the next. Nonetheless, what works for one person could be a step into the right direction to your own healthy being. It can never hurt to try new things to help with your own thyroid disease! Im really interested in hearing her thoughts on hormonal imbalance. This is the part that endocrinologists dont really touch on (at least all the ones Ive been to). And its such a huge part of hypothyroidism, and definitely makes my own journey very complex.

When reading this interview with Jillian Michaels, I had a wonderful aha! moment. I love when I have those! I found this interview in Health magazine's, November issue. This is the question/answer that stuck out to me:

Q: In terms of our fitness efforts, where do we go wrong?

A: We sell ourselves short when it comes to capability and potential. We read on the treadmill. We walk. People will be like, “I’ve been walking.” And I’m like, “Really? Really?” [Laughs.] “OK, you walked to the car, and then to the door at the mall, and then you took the stairs, too? Come on, man.”

If I can take a 66-year-old man and train him six hours a day, six days a week, you can do more than just take the stairs! People have no concept of what the human body is really designed to do. They have no concept of their strength! And they function in a zone that is well below what their potential really is.

This is so true. Ive been at the gym so many times, jump on a piece of equipment for 30 minutes and pat myself on the back like I just completed a marathon. And was that 30 minutes everything I could give it? Was it high intensity? Or was it just a leisure workout? More than likely it was somewhere around leisurely. I am selling myself short. I am not reaching my FULL potential. I'm only cheating myself! (As you can tell Jillian is in my head. ha!)

Go big or go home, right?

I have the odds against me with my thyroid disease in the first place, so yes sir I need to go BIG! Im putting in the time for the workout, so why not push myself to get the most out of my workout? Seems like common sense doesnt it? Than why do we so often NOT do it? Because we think we can't do it? Or maybe because we think simply working out is an accomplishment by itself. But who wants to be mediocre? Not me! Making strides in my workouts gives me confidence. I know this from experience. And I want that feeling back again!

With all that being said, today (dont you love first day of the months?), was my first 60 minute cardio session. I did a 3 mile run and than jumped on the elliptical for 15 minutes. During my run I got all the way up to 5.7mph! Lately Im lucky if I get up to 5 mph. I just kept pushing myself and it felt great! And guess what? I didnt die. I didnt fly off the treadmill. I adapted to it. Amazing what you can do when you just try!

So excited to see where I am at the end of this month!

Not as easy as riding a bike....

We are having a little bit of a heat wave here in Michigan. We had a high of 36 degrees today. I don't know if it ever got that high, but when I got outside it was around 10am and felt pretty balmy.

I decided that I would take advantage of this heat wave and take my run outside today. Now I just recently got back into the running game...and quite honestly its kicking my butt. Seriously. See Homer over there...I felt exactly like that. (And actually I think Ive used that Homer image before! HA!) The treadmill seems just a little bit easier these days. But I loathe the treadmill. So getting outside is good. I need to get use to winter running if I plan on running any races anyways. So out I went.

I got through 2 miles. I felt like I was in super slow motion, like when Will Farrell gets hit in the jugular in Old School. LOL I can definitely tell you that getting back into running is not as easy as riding a bike again. No sir. But it did feel good to have a 2 mile base. I remember when I very first started running a few years ago...30 seconds felt just like 2 miles felt today. Now that is something to reflect on :)

I would like to run a half marathon again...and something that may be happening in April (that I cant mention right now) would definitely motivate me to get in shape. So a half marathon could really be in my future. Right now 13.1 miles seems crazy....but Ive done it before so I know I can do it. One mile at a time.

Fresh Start

Something about the first of the month I just love. Its like a new beginning, a fresh start. Wipe that slate clean, and try to make this month better than the last. At least that is how I like my outlook to be.

Unfortunately this morning I didnt have that positive attitude. I defintely woke up on the wrong side of the bed. I attempted to go to bed early last night since Ive been so exhausted. After about 30 minutes I was woken up by fireworks. It sounded like they were being lit off my roof. Well they pretty much were. See I live in a pretty ghetto area. I hate it. But its where I live so I deal. And we are pretty much stuck here due to the economy so we try to make the best of it. Until shit like this happens, than I start to get really pissed off. The house next door to us was foreclosed years ago. And its been empty. For a LONG time. It has given us so many issues, especially one disgusting one in particular. We have dealt with many mice issues due to this. Many, many mice issues. It grosses me out thinking about it again. So when someone bought it I was pretty excited that finally the property was going to be cared for. Well the city forced them to tear the house down. And of course they are not rebuilding. So its just a vacant lot now. Lovely. A vacant lot that 10 neighborhood kids think is their playground, and love to bring in all kinds of shovels and dig up holes. But thats a story for another day.

So last night my lovely neighbors thought it was a grand idea to use the vacant lot to light off these huge fireworks. That started around 10pm and lasted for over an hour. The fireworks were pretty much being shot over our house. Dont these idiots realize they are lighting off fireworks in a weed infested lot and theres a good chance a fire would happen? These houses are to close to be lighting off those big fireworks! Nope, not them. They were tailgating, and having a good ol time. No one on my street would have the sense to think...oh people might have to work tomorrow, maybe we should wait till Friday. If they worked maybe they would understand. But yeah your not finding people like that in this neighborhood. You know people with COMMON SENSE! ARGH!

So as you can image I woke up on the wrong side of the bed. Tired and cranky. So I was in a foul mood most of the day. I still packed my gym bag this morning, and planned on hitting the gym since I hadnt in the last two days. As the day progressed I thought...I should just go home, and veg. But I didnt. I knew my mood needed some brightening up. I made it to the gym after work, and started in on my 2.5 mile scheduled run. It was not a pretty sight. Struggles through the whole thing. But I worked through it. And through those awful side stitches. Even after taking a walking break for those things, I would usually just stop, but I finished out my last half mile with running. Go me :) I did feel great afterwards. To bad I ruined it with what I ate for dinner. oy! We will focus on the gym part for now :)

So yes, new month. New goals. New beginnings. Fresh Start. July is going to be a good month. I can feel it.

Missing Pieces

So summer is here, which is a great thing. But lately Ive been feeling a little lost. Usually every summer Im so busy with training and fundraising for the Breast Cancer 3 Day. Now this summer Im just as equally busy with summer school, work, and wedding planning. But I still feel this void. This huge sadness. I miss the 3 Day!

I miss cramming in all those training walks. In the sticky, humid, heat. Especially the chats that go along with those walks. Jen and I barely see each other now! It was like my everyday therapy session with her. I miss that excitement I get leading up to the week of the event. Finding out opening and closing ceremonies. Going through the check in process online. Preparing for the event by making tshirts, and finding pink fluffy things to accessorize in. I miss the scrambling around to put on one last fundraiser event to meet my goal. Packing and repacking my bag to make sure its at the weight limit. Funny how when those things are happening you dont realize how you would miss them if they werent there.

The Breast Cancer 3 Day is such an amazing event, and it makes me feel like I have a purpose. I feel so great being a participant. Im saving and chaning lives, literally. So when thats not there this year I feel a huge void. Sometimes I think I need the 3 day more than it needs me! I feel like Im wandering through the summer wishing I had something to work towards. Instead Im wedding planning, and feel like Im failing miserably at it! Seriously, Im so clueless at this wedding planning and afraid Im going to end up with this hokey event. Im sure it wont, and it will all work out in the end. I have to keep reminding myself, its just a different type of planning. Ive planned tons of fundraising events. This one just feels a little bit more pressured! lol

I dont know if this void is what is zapping my motivation. But I seriously have none. I try to do things to find it, but its so lost. I thought signing up for a race might force motivation. I will find races to sign up for, but than I dont do the deed and sign up. The two races I previously had on my blog I never signed up for, nor trained for. Ive added two new ones today. We shall see if I take the dive and sign up for those. I sat down today and made out a workout schedule starting next Monday till October 18th. Its a little overachieverish, seeing that my workouts are so sporadic right now. Going from 1 workout day a week to 5 is probably not the smartest choice. But I have been known to be an all or nothing girl. I printed out this months workout schedule and put it on the fridge. I thought I would give myself a star for the days I worked out. And told Grant he can put whatever he wants on the days Im suppose to work out and dont. Im looking for any motivation at this point!

I want to get excited about something. Something that is health related. I remember the way I felt when I was in great shape going into the 3 Day. Or how I felt after I ran my half marathon last year. I want that excitement again. I need to find that again.

One Year Ago Today....

I ran my first half marathon. And it was absolutely amazing. I found myself pretty sad about it today actually. Sad, and a little mad that I couldn't get my crap together to run it this year. I will cut myself some slack that I have had quite the difficult year. (but seriously I cant use that excuse forever) It still made me a little sad when Ive been listening to all the race stories this weekend. I definitely had some envy!

So enough is enough. Today is a great day to recommit myself. I know. I know. You've heard this a thousand times. But this day last year was really such a huge milestone for me. I can remember it like it was yesterday. The emotions I felt that day I cant even put into words. It was just a really amazing experience. When you accomplish things you never think are in your reach...its life changing. No one can take that memory or feeling away. Its always nice to just go back to that moment, and get that warm fuzzy feeling all over.

Shortly after that wonderful day. About 10 days later I was hit with the passing of my dad. Life has been flipped upside down since than. Im in this constant struggle of control. Ill start to move forward, getting a good momentum of motivation, and than bam pulled back in the opposite direction. Im tired of it. I want that feeling back that I got on that day I ran my first half marathon. I can control that. I can control how I react to things. Running is one thing that has always maintained normalcy during all of this. And a lot of my reactions should involve it.

So as I reminisce on that amazing day, again Im saying it out loud for all of you to read. I am recommitting to myself. I owe it to myself. I deserve it. Im in control of my life. So I got derailed. I get derailed often. Its what I do after that derailment that matters. I ran a half marathon last year. I am capable of big things. Even if at times I feel like Im not worth it. Or Im more a failure than a successor. In the end of the day, the only person I have to impress is myself. Who happens to also be the only one who has me thinking these negative thoughts! I challenge myself to replace that negativity with positivity. And prove to myself that I am worth it. I challenge myself to react in a healthy positive way.

I also need to stop looking at the big picture, and take each day as it comes. Just try to make each day better than the last. Each meal better than the last. Each workout better than the last.

On that note, today was a good day. And tomorrow I will make even better.

Cincinnati...watch out. Melissa will be back for another Flying Pig Half Marathon in 2010 :)

I Need More Consistency - A Healthy You Check In

So I had a rough first week. I dont know what my deal is. Do I not care enough? Do I not want it enough? Do I not think Im good enough? I wish I had the answers to those questions.

Ive been in such a funk lately. All I want to do is lounge around the house, and than I make up all these excuses to justify why Im so lazy. I know what I need to do, but I dont do it. I keep eating like crap, drinking like crap, feeling like crap...what do I need to do to want to make a change?

I only made it out for one run this past week, mostly due to the snow and dropping temps. This year Im such a baby about running outside. Seriously. I ran through the entire winter last year. I do think we had a much more mild winter last year. And it really didnt get as cold as it is now until January and only lasted a few weeks. The desire to run in the cold is just not there this year. I dont have a gym membership right now, due to financial reasons. But I did see that they are opening a LA Fitness a few miles away. I want to check it out and see if they have any good deals going on. Ive heard that its a little expensive...but its a month to month contract which is always a plus to me :) I also got something in the mail from Bally's trying to recruit old members. $99 for a year! Cant be that. I wonder what the catches are though. Either way, I need to budget in a gym membership because Im just not the type that will workout at home as often as I should!

One thing I have learned through my yo-yo dieting experience is that consistency is the key. I need to be more consistent. Even if I start off with something small like being active 15 minutes a day, a few times a week. Or maybe focus on consistency by having 2 out of 3 healthy meals a day. Small consistent goals.

I guess Im having a hard time with the grief and depression. Im really letting it consume me in a unhealthy way. I need to find a balance. Allowing a period for the sadness, and than move forward. Instead Im letting it consume me whole, which is leading to very unhealthy habits. So one goal for this upcoming week....I will blog about my sad feelings, and when I hit submit the grief period is over. I will than follow up with an healthy activity that make me happy. I also think Ill stick to the 2 out of 3 good meals a day. Im open to any suggestions to!

I will have a better week 2 :)

Me? A Runner?

Ive always felt like a runner wannabe. I always wondered...will I ever truly feel like a runner? At what point? Do I have to cross off a list of races I completed before I actually classify myself as a runner? These questions go through my mind over and over. Often when Im running.

My running career started around this time last year. I decided that I wanted to start running to stay in shape, because I felt I was in the best shape that I have been in a long time. And I didnt want to lose that! So I started the couch to 5k program. As I finished off that training program, I ran my first 5k, a Turkey Trot race. I continued to run after that, and my next race I ran was on NYE, a 4 miler race. And I didnt stop there. I decided I would run a half marathon next. With that decision I started a half marathon training plan. Halfway through that plan I ran a 10k. And I finished off my running season in May by running the Flying Pig Half Marathon. All the times I made on all these races were better than I expected. I was pretty amazed at myself, and what I had accomplished.

But even after running all those races I still felt like I was never truly a runner. I was just a wannabe runner. Just getting through each race. I dont know if its just some self esteem issue or what. But I felt like outsider in a way...a running wannabe.

So after that half marathon I took a running break. The summer was coming and I wasnt planning on training through the hot, humid summer. My dad also passed away. So I took a break from a lot of things. Than I was training for the Breast Cancer 3 Day, so running definitely took a back burner. Now that I have time I have started to run again. And Im back at square one, well almost. I do have a base of about 3 miles that I can run..which feels great. But I still feel like Im really out of shape, and that my lungs might explode when Im running. I haven't been as consistent as I should be, so I know that may be why it feels so difficult everytime I get out there. It definitely doesn't feel like riding a bike again. Much, much harder.

But I do know is what it feels like to run a half marathon. I do know that with consistent training it may not get easier per say, but will feel more comfortable. And I can get back to the place I was before with practicing some consistency. As far as not feeling like a runner? Who can truly identify what a runner feels like? Im sure it feels different to everybody. It all depends on your goals. We all run our own run. Our own race. We determine what our running career will be. And what feels like success to each of us.

A great thing to always remember is....every runner , whatever level, was a non-runner at some point.

So even though I guess my running status from time to time, okay so all the time, I can proudly yes I am a runner. Amazing what can happen when you replace the negative talk with a little bit of positivity.

Phew! Im Out Of Shape!

So Ive decided to start running again. Just a short 5 months ago I ran in my first ever half marathon. It was absolutely amazing, and I felt like I was in the best shape of my life! The summer came, and I didnt want to run in the heat, and going through the things I was going through..I decided to take a break from running. Now that Im starting again, I wish I didnt take a break. LOL

So last weekend I got out there and ran 3.75 miles with no problem. It must have been a whim. Because today I felt like I was going to die! Since I was able to push out 3.75 miles last weekend, I decided that I will run the 10k on Thanksgiving vs the 5k. Why not. I like the longer distance. Ive ran in 5ks, 4 milers, 10ks, and half marathon. And 10k was always a fun distance to me. It will make me strive a little bit harder than if I was training for a 5k. So Ive set up a schedule from now till Thanksgiving, so I have 7 weeks to get my ass in shape!

Running has always been the best cardio for me. I see the results I want, and I feel great when Im done. Even with how hard it can feel while Im doing it. I also love being outside and active. Your among other active people. And you get that special nod, wave, or smile when you pass each other. Its pretty damn cool. And it was a beautiful evening. The sky was a pretty blue, the clouds were fluffy, and the sun was just setting. It was beautiful out. I love outdoors :)

So today was Day 1 of the training program. I ran 2.5 miles, and it took me about 35 minutes with cool down. A little on the slow side, but I was moving the whole time. Which was my goal. I was huffing and puffing like Puff the Magic Dragon. Seriously I thought I was going to keel over. Than I thought about when I was finishing that half marathon this past May, and kept right on moving. It will get easier, with time and consistency. And I have to admit I was pretty happy that I have a 2.5 mile base. I thought Id be right back at square one. With running/walking rotated every 60/90 seconds!

So a 10k in 7 weeks. I can so do this.